USA Republican Presidential Candidate’s Unexpected MMA Dream

45-year-old Republican candidate Ted Cruz has dropped out of the presidential race in order to devote more time to his MMA training.

Citing a disillusionment with politics, sources close to Cruz said that he was sick of  enacting mere proxy violence on disadvantaged members of North American society and instead wanted to “really, actually hurt some poor people…like, by hand?”.

The consumate Thai stylist dropped the news with a textbook side elbow to the face of wife Heidi; all of his us here at Cageburn MMA wish him the best in following the footsteps of cousin Dominic…by amassing as many career-threatening injuries as possible.

ted-cruz-elbows-wife-02-3f1328cb-9d66-4f21-8fca-81af3d9a3012

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s