Conor McGregor Retires; Satanism Key Factor

Conor McGregor retired from MMA on Tuesday with the Tweet Heard ‘Round the World. The cryptic 140 character message left many people questioning its meaning. Was it a power play or a negotiation tool? Was he strongly affected by the recent death of Brazilian fighter Joao Carvalho at a Dublin MMA event he attended? Is he afraid of his rematch with Nate Diaz at UFC 200 or, more sinisterly, a pending drug test? Is he on MMAeth? The MMA-osphere was sent reeling, scouring for clues and answers.

A Cage Burn exclusive blows the cover on the otherwise unrevealed motivation behind the surprise retirement. What we’re about to reveal may shock sensibilities and conventional mores. McGregor is not afraid for his health, his career, his pay check or anything else. McGregor is, beholden to Satan!

There is no Dee Devlin. ‘Dee Devlin’ is in fact, an anagram for Need Devil.

McGregor needs the devil. So if you are searching for reason in his actions search no further.

Red Panties Satan
Conor’s idea of ‘Red Panty Night’

When he ruins your viewing plans for UFC 200 a mere 3 months out from the event… Satan!

When he destroys the recently created Irish MMA Bandwagon… Satan!

When he talks about buying and selling other fighters on CNBC… Satan!

When he discusses red panties and how one may or may not otherwise see them in their lifetime… you guessed it, Satan!

We here at Cage Burn MMA usually toe the politically correct line of not denouncing Satan Worship for fear of attack by social justice warriors. But sometimes enough is enough. Maybe you can call this an Op Ed piece. Maybe we’re overstepping the line. But please Conor, please denounce Satan and return to UFC 200. In the name of Christ, we can’t wait until UFC 666.

Advertisements

3 thoughts on “Conor McGregor Retires; Satanism Key Factor

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s